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Pamela Mingo

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My Imaginary COVID Lockdown

If I have to stay home because of a pandemic...I'm imagining I'm in my fabulous apartment in Paris. O-o-o-la-la!

Now I'm having a nice cup of tea in my imaginary apartment in Paris. Where is my chat?

Ah...here is my chat Minou! She is in my fabulous imaginary kitchen. Wait...she has eaten all the fucking flour!

My chat has eaten all the flour. I now have left my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris to buy a baguette. Accessories are a must.

Here I am in my imaginary excellent wine cellar. Isn't it formidable? Don't be jealous, I'm allergic to wine...more for you!

Oh look there is my imaginary boyfriend Henri and his dog Jeff. We practice social distancing by keeping three baguettes apart. O-o-o-la-la!

Is it possible I also have a fabulous imaginary rooftop garden in Paris? Mais oui! Luckily I also have imaginary gardeners!

In a pandemic, I am alone to train with weights. Even when it is tres difficle, it is always tres chic.... especially in my imaginary apartment in Paris!

In self isolation...pas de quoi. I can never be bored in my imaginary apartment in Paris!

Je vous aime beaucoup my imaginary boyfriend Henri! He and his chien Jeff have climbed to the neuf floor to see me. Like a French fly..very tres chic!

ZUT FRIGGIN ALORS!! I left the window open for one minute and these creatures got in...in two straight lines. Now the place is infested with them!

You little merdes! Get the hell out of my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris...si vous plait! (One must always be polite in a pandemic).

MINOU DROP IT! OH MON DIEUX!

One must NEVER forget to ferme la port when imaginary chats are around.

Alone in my imaginary apartment in Paris, I wear the style that suits me best. Yup....still got that je ne sa quoi pizazz!

Welcome to my glamorous imaginary room de bain in Paris! I never run out of hot l'eau and the towels are always thick and fluffy. The cupboard is full of overly priced crams and soaps made...guess? In Paris of course! Isolation can smell tres bon!

My neighbour Juliette Binoche is always sending me her home baked eclairs and macaroons. I tell her to stop or I'll get fat and then we laugh. Who cares in a pandemic? J'aime beaucoup imaginary friends!

AU SECOURS!! Gerard Depardieu has stolen Juliette Binoche's home baked goods! Oh that surprisingly fit bastard! I am so very tres miserable.

Whenever I'm feeling a bit "Les Miz", I have breakfast on my imaginary balcony in Paris. I drink a bon espresso and make friends with the French wildlife. Nature always restores my joi de livre!

There are always puppies when you need them in my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris! Je vous aime warm fur in a pandemic!

Sometimes I just need a cozy spot to think of all that I'm grateful for. Friends, family and internet connection in my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris!

Covid hair, Covid hair..do I care yer growing everywhere? Feeling more like a European everyday! O-o-o-la-la!

In my imagination, I am a tech genius. I have made an AI salon robot. Voila...I bring the chic to computer geek!

NEVER let a robot cut your hair even in a pandemic.

This is one of the many bedrooms in my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris! Unfortunately, it's the one I imagined when I was six. The bedframe doesn not break no matter how many times I jump on it and the hairdryer keeps me warm. P.S. I imagined my hair grown back with less grey and more volume.

I have an imaginary cuisine extraordinaire and a formidable French chef of course! She insists on good lighting when preparing meals. I have chandeliers in every room. I am tres chic.

I like to improve myself during this isolation by taking an online course with Cirque du Soleil! Merde....I hope I don't fall onto the coffee table or set fire to my silks. Pas de quoi..this is all in my mind. Bisou!

Today is "couch day" during lockdown . I look up and think how much I je t'adore an imaginary vaulted ceiling.

Check out my imaginary art studio! It looks out onto my imaginary rooftop garden. But wait...MON DIEU!...who is that guy down there? DUDE! Get the hell out of my imagination! How rude... especially in a pandemic.

Couldn't get rid of the rude dude. Luckily, I imagine another tres bon studio in my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris. It has a swing. O-o-o-la-la!

Some nights I ne pas sleep very well.

Last night I had a dream I was floating home...bonne nuit!

Missing my friends during this lockdown. Sending you fabulous imaginary dreams as I float by. J'aime beaucoup mes amis! Bisou! Xx

OMG!!!! David Bowie has descended from the CN tower in a dream to tell me I've been accepted into the Toronto Outdoor Art Fair. (Now an online fair). I better wake up as I've got to get to work painting! Merci beaucoup David Bowie!

Yup...David Bowie actually came to me in a dream to tell me I got into the Toronto show. I'm a fan.

Minou and I play Phantom of the Opera. During a lockdown, sometimes a shower isn't enough.

How I miss my imaginary boyfriend Henri! He and his chien Jeff are probably doing something c'est formidable in these unprecedented, challenging and unusual times! I am so proud Henri..bisou ma Cherie! Xx

Regarded vous,...all the French "Jacques" live in a building over there. Jacques Cousteau, Cartier, Chiroc and even frere Jacques. Paris is so cool.

MINOU!!! Oh MON DIEU!!! My imaginary chat fell off the balcony of my fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris!

What a friggin' nightmare!!!!!!

I've asked my imaginary boyfriend and friend Juliette Binoche if they had seen Minou...they had not! Poor Minou! It's getting dark. I'm worried. Thank DIEU cats land on their feet.

Minou missed her petite dejuneur this morning. I had to eat her chocolate croissant. Now, I'm really worried.

OMG!! Running around Paris!!!

It's a challenge running around Paris, putting up signs looking for my missing chat. They've opened up some of the stores! I need help.

It is tres difficile to enjoy a fabulous imaginary apartment in Paris when your chat is missing!

In my awesome imaginary closet, I'm weaning out of jammies into civilian wear. "Sigh" Minou loved an empty shoebox. :(((

I'm sure the Parisians will help my Minou!

My imaginary boyfriend Henri.. o-o-o-la-la.. and his chien Jeff have heard that Minou was seen along the Boulevard Clichy! VITE! VITE!

Where are you Minou?

Merci Henri and Jeff!

Henri rescue Minou, s'il vous plait! She thinks she's a pidgeon stuck in a book of Paris photos. Merde, find her and get her out!

My imaginary chat is an idiot. I need another crepe. Quelle annee!

Merci beaucoup Henri and Jeff for rescuing my Minou! I am imagining her back in my arms now. Bisou! xxxxoo

Now on my fabulous imaginary vacation in the south of France. Wish you were here! Bisou! xxx

The making of ...

Contact Info

pam@pamelamingo.com

© Pamela Mingo 2001 - 2021